Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Last Night's Class

Last night's class went really well. I always feel like I am pulling the wool over everyone's eyes by hiding the fact that I'm actually getting cancer treatment. I don't know why but I feel like it is something I should be telling everyone ... they could probably care less ... well you know what I mean. If I don't tell them, it's like I'm keeping a secret from them. Sometimes I tell white lies and say ... yes I'm working right now. I just don't want to say I'm on disability for cancer.

The same thing happens when you run into an old acquaintance ... in say the grocery store ... do I tell them or not? That is the question. It seems to be the first thing that crosses my mind. I guess there is no easy answer but I sure wish that need to say something would go away.

Tonight I'm off to supper with a fellow breast cancer survivor. We usually get together every couple of months but it's definitely been longer. I look forward to that.

5 comments:

Michelle said...

Yes, my mum went through that too. Unfortunately living in a small town soon fixed that, everybody knows.

Audrey said...

I think you have to do what feels right. Some people choose to disclose, others don't. The biggest challenge lies in how you deal with the reactions of others.
Not a helpful offering, I know. But I do think you have to follow your heart/head/soul...whatever!
Glad that class went well.
xoxoxo

Lisa said...

sending you love- your life, your choices xx

Denise said...

I am a very private person and I think it has to be a personal decision...... You will speak your heart regardless of what that is..... It is your life...... You can decide...... No decision is wrong.... Just yours..........

Jill said...

I know just what you mean. It seems to be my first thought too - more often than I like. I'm getting better than when I first started venturing out after chemotherapy, but I still mentioon it a fair bit. I don't notice so much these days, but if I'm out with my daughter she does. Only last Friday she said to me "It's always cancer with you isn't it " and I said "yes". But really it's just something we live with and others don't. I think it can be a way of coping whilst not hiding from it. Making it normal when it isn't for most of the world around us. I'm not as bad as when I first started - it does get less of a compulsion I think with time.