Monday, April 6, 2009

Monday Morning

Today is still a very 'weak' day for me but my mind continues to clear up. I am beginning to look forward towards the week when I'm feeling well enough to get out and about.

I'm so glad those few awful days are almost done with and I'm sure you are too. It is a very depressing time for me and I'm sure not fun for you to read.

This morning, I even hear the birds singing outside my bedroom window ... that was nice. I've been sleeping in the spare bedroom for the last few nights because my sleeping has been a nightmare. I snore quite a bit with my stuffy nose, so I just figure I'll give my husband a break and let him get some sleep. I've mentioned before, with chemo I actually stop breathing in my sleep ... for up to 15 seconds ... according to my husband and then I gasp for air. That's got to be hard on him.

This morning I woke up with a nose bleed and want to nurse that to the point I can go have a shower. I've been living in the same clothes for a few too many days and really really need a fresh set.

My plans for the day are to build strength.


Sherry said...

Building strength is good -- and when you can start to see the "joyful" things you know you are coming out of the worst of the chemo. Depressing to read? No, not at all. Life isn't all "highs" -- it's got to have it's lows too. Have a peaceful day -- and you'll feel so much better after a shower and a fresh start to your day!

Anonymous said...

Daria, I am happy that you are on the upswing! I cannot imagine how difficult it is to go through the "depressing" stage of each cycle but what I admire about you is your honesty in sharing this. It is so important to let others know that what they are experiencing in not unique to them. You are my hero!
Can't wait to see you tomorrow!

Michelle said...

I'm just happy that you have good weeks in with the bad ones.
It must be quite hard to know what it's going to be like and yet choose to keep doing it anyway.
I admire your spunk lady!

Hope you feel better quickly


Alli said...

Daria. I keep saying it. You are an inspiration. Without your example it would be harder than ever to plug along. but if you can do so can others. Including me!! Yes back from surgery.... sore tired but OK!!

Kerry said...

Daria..I think when we write honestly about our battle with cancer it helps others gain perspective on things. Depression is something that's part of the package.
I don't think its depressing reading your story . It kinda is what it is and an honest look at what your dealing with.
Glad you joined me at my blog..Thanks for the comment. Nice to know several are reading.

Renee said...

Daria just relax today. That is all you need to do.

Taxotere is a hard chemo, but I know that you can do it. You need to do what can help keep the devil at bay.

You are doing it.

The sadness is very difficult. The rotten stomach and the rotten sick feeling is very difficult.

Just breathe today, that is all you have to do.

Love Renee xoxox

Unknown said...

hello darling- sending love times a zillion xx

Roxanne said...

Thank you for sharing how you feel. It makes some of us know it's OK to feel that way too. Hugs to you!!